Let's PlayThe Feud
by caseymac42
Summary: Johnny convinces his buddies to join him on a new game show. **Takes place in 1976, before Roy and Johnny had been promoted to captains.


**Let's Play…The Feud**

After taking a phone call in Captain Stanley's office, Johnny was noticeably upbeat as he rejoined his friends for lunch. He wore a big grin, and had a bit of a swagger in his step.

Noticing the junior paramedic's very animated body language, Hank was the first to ask the question.

"So…are you going to enlighten us as to whom you were talking to on the phone, pal? It obviously was a good call."

Stopping behind his chair and, leaning forward on the back of it, Johnny continued to flash one of his famous crooked grins, and looked at each of his friend's faces. "How would you guys all like the opportunity to win a lot of money?"

Met by five pairs of eyes looking quite skeptically at him, Johnny was not deterred. "I mean it. Who's with me?"

Knowing his partner better than perhaps any of the other guys, Roy was the one who asked the next question. "Okay, I'll bite. Who was that on the phone, Johnny?"

Pulling his chair out, the paramedic sat down and continued to smile.

"Does the name Linda Baxter sound familiar to you, Roy?"

Repeating the name, Roy shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. "Linda Baxter?"

Chiming in with a smirk was Chet. "Wasn't she the chick who dumped you a few months ago?"

Running his fingers through his thick dark hair, Johnny's exasperation was becoming quite evident. "No…no…no."

"Baxter?" Marco repeated, and then added, "Isn't the TV news anchor on KABC named Baxter?"

Jumping into the fray, Mike attempted to set Marco straight. "Marco, I'm pretty sure that you're referring to Ted Baxter. He's the news anchor on the Mary Tyler Moore Show. Ted Carpenter is the anchor on KABC."

Listening to his friends seemingly making fun of him, Johnny felt like he was about to explode, as his exasperation continued to escalate.

"John, you mind sharing with us who Linda Baxter is?" Hank asked calmly.

Johnny wanted to let out a loud groan, but thought better of it. "Linda Baxter worked behind the scenes on the Tom Jensen Show."

Not quite sure where this was going, Roy interrupted his partner.

"What does Linda Baxter have to do with us?"

"Well…if you guys would all be quiet…I'll tell you."

Urging his sparring partner to hurry, Chet used his left hand to make a "get on with it" motion. "Gage…before the alarms go off and we get called out."

"Man…I don't believe you guys. I'm giving you an opportunity to get rich, and you don't even wanna hear about it."

"Johnny…we're listening. Just tell us what Linda Baxter has to do with us." Roy wanted to simmer his partner down, before he wound himself like a corkscrew into a cork.

"There's this new game show on TV…Family Feud. Linda is the contestant coordinator for the show. They want to do a special show with firefighters playing against cops or something like that. She remembered me and Roy from the other show, and how we saved that guy's life, and thought that we would be perfect contestants."

Roy looked calmly over at his best friend. "You can count ME out, partner. I was already on one TV game show, remember? Two years ago, me and Joanne…sound familiar?"

Johnny nodded his head. "Yeah, I remember, Roy. You got the final answer wrong. You said that your favorite vegetable was artichokes when it was obviously peas. Joanne got it wrong, too…said it was carrots."

Receiving a glare from his friend, Johnny turned away and focused on the other four men seated at the table. "That's okay, Roy. There's only room for five guys on a team anyway. The rest of us will do it…so you don't have to worry about it."

Hank shook his head and held up his hand. "I don't know about this, John. I'm a captain with the fire department. This could look pretty silly."

Silly?" came Chet's reply. "We could look like complete fools. I don't know about this, either."

Mike and Marco exchanged a look with each other, and both shrugged.

"I don't know about you guys, but I'm no fool. You can count me in, Johnny."

Johnny smiled appreciatively as he held up his glass of iced tea in a toast.

"Thanks Mike. I knew I would be able to count on you. Marco?"

Nodding his head, Marco also agreed to participate in Johnny's latest endeavor.

"Me too. It might be kinda fun."

"Alright…"

Continuing to sit there grinning, Johnny waited for either his partner or his captain to take the final spot.

"Cap…what do ya say? If we play the police department, wouldn't you like to be able to beat up on a captain with the LAPD or something?"

Rubbing the back of his head, Hank displayed his indecisiveness.

"I don't know, John. Let's say I do decide to go on with you guys…if Chet agrees too, how do we divide any winnings if Roy isn't included?"

Roy held up his hand. "Don't worry about me, Cap."

Looking curiously at his senior medic, with a raised eyebrow, Hank wasn't quite sure what to make of Roy's response.

"Are you implying something, Roy? That we're not smart enough, perhaps?"

"I never said that, Cap. I think…well, what I think doesn't matter. Just like when you guys entered that barbershop quartet competition…you guys won…albeit in the comedy division, despite what I thought about your abilities."

Loudly sighing, Hank decided that it might be a good opportunity. "Okay, I'm in."

All eyes turned to the mustachioed Irishman.

"Chester B…are you in…or do I need to find a replacement for ya?"

"Okay, Gage…I'll do it." relented Chet.

And just like that it was decided that Johnny, Marco, Mike, Hank, and Chet would make up the team that would compete on the game show.

After everything was settled, Hank asked another important question.

"John, at the risk of starting another round of hemming and hawing…what exactly is the premise of this show?"

"It's a survey show. The question might be, name a famous William. Let's say you ring in first. Your answer might be William Shatner."

Looking at Johnny like he had two heads, Chet shook his head. "William Shatner? Who would even think of William Shatner?"

As a groan escaped his mouth, Johnny did his best to prevent himself from strangling his longtime nemesis.

"Chet…it was only an example. It could have been anything. It could have been William Shakespeare, or William Penn. That's the point of the game."

"Shouldn't we start studying then? You know, so we DON'T look silly?"

Protecting his own ego, Mike Stoker gave his friend a smile. "I don't know about the rest of you guys, but I DON'T plan on looking silly, Chet. I plan on winning, especially if we're gonna play the LAPD."

Again feeling on the top of the world, Johnny was happy that his friends had agreed to go on the show with him, although he was rather disappointed with his best friend. Roy had a history of dragging his feet, he did it with the hotdog stand endeavor, and he was not very supportive with their barbershop quartet efforts, either. Despite not having Roy aboard on this, Johnny decided that when they won all the money, he would gladly throw a few bucks his buddy's way.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Over the next two weeks, the guys would discuss the various categories that might come up on the show, and what some of their answers would be. Even Hank started to get into it. He started to think that the experience might even be fun. Being a huge Hogan's Heroes fan, Chet also changed his tune when he heard that Richard Dawson was the host of the show.

"I hear that Richard Dawson kisses all the female contestants." said Marco nonchalantly.

Making a face, Chet shook his head. "It better just be the females. If he tried that with me…he'd be in trouble."

When the day came that they were to be taping the show, they all met at the studio. Dressed in their uniforms, they were in the "green room" waiting for the call to come out to the set.

"Roy did say he'd be out in the audience, right Gage?"

"Yes, Chet. Roy is out there with Joanne, Mrs. Stanley, Marco's folks, and Mike's Uncle Marty. It's too bad that you couldn't get anyone from your family to come."

"It's okay. I'll celebrate with them later…after we win the cash."

When it came time for them to take their places on the set, they sat down behind the big door that would open and reveal them. Their police counterparts did the same. Then came the announcer's booming voice introducing both teams.

"It's time for the Family Feud. Introducing the LA County Firefighters…Hank, Mike, John, Marco, and Chet…ready for action…and the LAPD…Steven, Tucker, Preston, Cody, and Casey …ready for action. Let's start the family feud. Here's the star of Family Feud…Richard Dawson."

When it came time for them to take their places at their podium, Hank was in the first spot, followed by Mike, Johnny, Marco, and then Chet. On the opposite side of the set were their counterparts from the LAPD.

"Welcome to Family Feud everybody. We have a special game today…members of the LA County Fire Department playing against members of the LAPD. Let's meet the teams…The Fire Department."

Walking over to Hank, the affable host shook the captain's hand.

"Hello there. Why don't you introduce yourself and your team members, sir?"

Smiling, Hank nodded his head. "Nice to meet you, Richard. I'm Hank Stanley, a captain with the department. This is Engineer Mike Stoker, paramedic John Gage, and firefighters Marco Lopez and Chet Kelly."

"Gentlemen welcome. And now let's meet the police department."

After Richard exchanged greetings and introductions with the other men, the game began.

"Okay, it's time to play…the feud."

Walking up to the smaller podium where the competing players met one on one, both captains shook hands, and the first question was read.

"One hundred people were surveyed, and the top seven answers are on the board. Other than a bull, name a big animal that you wouldn't want in your china shop."

Ringing the buzzer first was Hank.

"Elephant."

Looking up at the board, Hank's answer was revealed to be the number one answer.

"Forty-seven points, Hank…number one answer. Are you fellas going to play or pass?"

Looking over at his men, Hank caught the exuberant expression on all of their faces, especially on Johnny and Chet's.

"We're going to play, Richard."

Shaking Mike's hand, Richard repeated the question.

Confident as always, the engineer nodded his head and said his answer.

"How about cow?"

As Mike's answer was revealed on the board, it was noted to be the second most popular answer.

Continuing on down the line, Johnny and Marco had gotten two more of the answers, but Chet's answer of giraffe was not in the top seven, and earned the first strike. They eventually were able to get the rest of the answers, and when the first round was finished, they had themselves a tidy 96 points.

"Round two…"

Mike Stoker made his way to the smaller podium to answer the next question.

"Gentlemen, the next question…again, 100 people surveyed…Name a bad job for someone who's accident prone to have."

Buzzing in first, Mike guessed, "driver."

Repeating the engineer's answer, Richard waited for the reveal. Sure enough it was the number one answer.

"Play or pass, Mike?"

"We'll play, Richard."

Walking over to Johnny, the host asked the paramedic why the rest of his team were seemingly laughing at him.

"Why are your buddies laughing at you, John?"

"It's uh…a long story. Let's just leave it at that. I'm going to say firefighter, Richard."

"Firefighter it is…makes a lot of sense. Let's see what the survey says…firefighter…"

The reveal showed it to be the third most popular answer.

The firefighters swept the second question as well.

The next question was "Name a recreational activity that is traditionally done in hot weather." It was another sweep for the firefighters, and they quickly found themselves playing for fast money. It was Chet who volunteered first, and then Mike. Chet would start, while the engineer would wait off stage until his turn.

"Okay, Chet we're going to play fast money now. There are five questions. Give me the most popular answer for each, and if you and your buddy Mike can get 200 points, you and your fellow firefighters will each share $5,000. Sound good?"

"Sounds great, Richard. And by the way, I never got to tell you that I am a big fan of yours…I loved Hogan's Heroes."

Kissing up to the host earned Chet a big smile and another handshake.

"Okay fifteen seconds on the clock…first question…Name a piece of clothing worn over other clothes."

"Sweater…"

"Name something that you buy pickled."

"Pickles…" came Chet's reply, earning chuckles from the audience.

"Name a job at a restaurant."

"Busboy…"

"Name a classical composer."

"Mozart…"

"Name something that a tennis player wears."

"Shorts…" came Chet's answer, to the applause and delight of his friends.

"Very good, shall we see how you did?"

When Chet's answers were revealed, they had a total of 102 points.

"Great job, Chet. Let's bring out your buddy…Michael."

When Mike came out to the set, he glanced up at the board to see what his predecessor's total was. When he noted the 102 points, he was actually quite impressed…Chester B had in fact pulled his weight on this.

Mike's answers to the questions were coat…cucumbers…waiter…Beethoven…and sneakers. Only needing 38 more points after his second answer, the audience erupted when the 52 point total was revealed for his answer of "waiter."

When the realization that they had just won $5,000 came to them, the rest of the firefighters enveloped Mike, and they all hugged and high-fived.

Just like that…it was over.

They played the feud…and won.

**THE END**


End file.
